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28 May 2009

Two thirds of three fifths of f*** all

There’s an old limerick that, among other things, speaks to the ridiculous use some people make of numbers.

Like say, repealing an old piece of legislation that is long spent and then claiming the process that this contributes to government’s project to eliminate red tape.

The spent legislation is an act that gave effect to a series of agreements involved in the sale of Corner Brook Pulp and Paper Limited to Kruger in 1984. It’s an easy read, in plain English, and involving only 10 clauses and a couple of hundred words.

Take, as an example, this clause:

9. (1) Subject to the approval of the Lieutenant-Governor in Council, the Honourable the Minister of Finance on behalf of the Crown is authorized to enter into, execute and deliver agreements amending the agreements referred to in this Act.

Pretty simple stuff.  The finance minister can negotiate changes to the agreements if need be and if approved by cabinet.

There is not a single line in this entire piece of legislation that creates a single useless, unnecessary or irrelevant regulatory burden on business.

Not a one.

To go by the words of the business minister earlier in May, there is not any element of this 1984 statute that would  involve“administrative and regulatory inefficiencies, including excessive regulations, requirements, reporting, processes and paper.”

Nothing.

So why then, would the minister responsible for the Kruger agreements repeal act make this demonstrably ridiculous statement in the legislature:

The repeal of this legislation, Mr. Speaker, will reduce an additional sixty-five regulatory requirements from government’s operations.

By the minister’s own words – a mere few seconds before that claim was made – “[a]ll of these agreements now have expired and because these agreements have expired… this legislation is no longer required and will not impact on Kruger’s operations in any way.”

What we have here is a clue to the entire sham of red tape reduction.  While there are undoubtedly some good measures in the red tape project, the announcement earlier this month of government’s triumph contained both a raft of things that had nothing to do with red tape reduction and a few more elements that are entirely bogus.

Like this Kruger one.

Blatant misrepresentation – i.e. spin or bullshit -  has apparently become such an integral part of government’s political communications that it spills out into relatively simple things like a statement in the House repealing an old statute. There was no need of saying much about, but the minister rambled on for a few seconds and then threw in this little piece of nonsense about red tape reduction.

The bullshit is not without meaning.

If you take a look at these two elements – Kruger and red tape – you see a government which must make things appear to be much larger and more significant than they are.  The evident reason is that someone, somewhere in the bowels of government thinks it is important to make it appear that government is actually up to something productive.  So intense is the need for aggrandisement that even the trivial is co-opted to the cause.

Of course, for those familiar with the Rule of Opposites, such obvious knob polishing only makes one wonder what the bullshit is intended to conceal.

Pile up enough crap and you can hide just about anything. 

-srbp-