27 April 2007

Joke em if they can't...the sequel

Premier Danny Williams repeatedly called the Prime Minister "Steve" Harper in a scrum today.

Williams wanted to show disdain for the Prime Minister comparable to the disdain Williams contends the Prime Minister displayed toward the province recently.

Such is the state of federal-provincial relations in the country.

Reportedly senior officials in the province's intergovernmental affairs secretariat are working on other options to deal with the federal government, including:

- stringing toilet paper in the trees at 24 Sussex;

- "egging" the Prime Minister's limousine;

- making it mandatory for all provincial officials to blow "raspberries" whenever anyone mentions the federal government at intergovernmental meetings;

- randomly calling the Prime Minister's office and asking if the PM's refrigerator is running;

- leaving messages for federal officials all over Canada that Mike Hunt from Newfoundland called. The automated answering system will put the caller into an endless loop of "if you are calling so-and-so press 2" options;

- ordering pizzas at all hours of the day and night having then sent to the Langevin Block;

- sneaking fart cushions into the Commons and randomly planting them on cabinet ministers' seats;

- having someone slip a dead skunk into the air conditioning system at Harrington Lake;

- when meeting their federal counterparts, provincial cabinet ministers are to do the fake-handshake-smooth-the-hair-instead-thing;

- putting plastic wrap across the toilet seats in the House of Commons washrooms;

- try to embarrass the PM by calling Frank magazine with a hot tip that the Prime Minister has a stylist on the office payroll;

- tell Loyola Hearn he can pull Danny's finger anytime but Danny is sooooooo pissed off Loyola won't even get a fart; and,

- Answer any future questions about the PM with: "Who? Never heard of him. He doesn't exist. So there. Neeener. Neener. Neener."

-30-

Postscript:

Sadly, the first bit of this post was true: Danny is resorting to calling the Prime Minister Steve.

The rest?

Well, hopefully it's just a little Friday evening levity.

Sad part of it is that, with these guys, ya just never know when the province's representative in Ottawa will be sent to the House of Commons gallery with orders to sit and stare at the Prime Minister until he gives in.

Things are almost that silly.