04 October 2006

Danny's Plants

Elizabeth Driscoll: I keep seeing these people, all recognizing each other. Something is passing between them all, some secret. It's a conspiracy, I know it.

Matthew Bennel : There can't be a conspiracy!

Elizabeth Driscoll: Matthew, I'm telling you something is going on here.

"There's no emotion. None. Just the pretense of it. The words, the gesture, the tone of voice, everything else is the same, but not the feeling."

If nothing else, when Danny Williams today unveiled the provincial government's new logo (it isn't a brand for the province, people), he gave us the real name of those people he and his staff arrange to go on radio call-in shows singing hymns of praise to The Leader's gloriously miracle-delivering backside.

They were out in force this afternoon of course, and again this evening.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I give you:

The Pitcher Plants.

Just think about it:

- There is something slightly creepy about the whole planted caller thing, anyway, in an Invasion of the Body Snatchers kinda way. The way they all say exactly the same sorts of things in almost exactly the same way...almost as if they were being fed by the same invisible vines.

The way they seem to appear and disappear the same way Danny appears and disappears and they always show up in clusters to attack anyone who isn't of The Body.

No wait.

That was Landreu and Star Trek.

But ya know what I mean..

- More than a few people have noted the things sticking up out of the new logo look supernatural or science fiction- ish.

- For some bizarre reason, Danny thinks those stalky things rising up from the Danny-redefined "Newfoundland" somehow embody the people of Newfoundland and Labrador. See? "body"..."embody". Huh? Huh?

- Danny has already said, our job, as Newfoundlanders and Labradorians is to fall in line behind him and back him up on whatever he says. That reduces us to the status of vegetation.

By, if ya think about it, it all starts to make sense. We are all just Danny's Plants.

After all, how else can you explain spending a million dollars on something as uncreative as the new "brand"?


Addendum: The price of the project was actually more like $1.1 million, at least. Danny neglected to mention - for some reason - the "branding" contract handed to Target in late 2004 to do opinion research on images of the province.

Without going to tender.

Wonder what other work he forgot to tell us about?