12 July 2008

Proud. Strong. Determined.

Nothing says "pride" like licking a puffin's arse and being a newfie.

Only in a period of pseudo-nationalist revival could we expect to see the provincially-owned liquor corporation  - now "re-branded" without the "and" in the name - start pushing the screech-in, again. 

Things haven't been this good for the entirely invented "tradition" since the last time a pseudo-nationalist administration ran the place.

We can all be assured apparently that the thing will be supervised by trained staff.

"The format will have to be approved and we'll do our best to ensure there's no deviation. Nothing will be said that is in any way demeaning," [liquor corporation president and CEO Steve Winter] said.

Nothing said, maybe but the very notion of the screech-in, never more than a marketing gimmick, is nothing but bad.

What's next? 

A little black face, a banjo and a good ole fashioned minstrel show to push the Jack Daniels and Southern Comfort?

Better still, let's introduce saki to the yokels by having some guy stuff in false buck teeth, wear giant black horn- rimmed glasses and shout "so solly" at odd intervals all the while running around doing a really bad Jelly Rewis impersonation. 


And it can all be done by staff who have been run through an intensive course and then duly certified to orchestrate a ceremony that keeps up the authentic tradition of racism and ethnic stereotyping the civilised world long since abandoned.

The fools.

This screech-in is indeed a wonderful artefact from our distant past, as we've been told. 

Ah yes, the 1970s. 

And what better time to revive it.

Seems the provincial government - which can't find the time to polish off legislation on its own university policy  - can manage to remind the universe once again of the only image many of them have of Newfoundland: the seal hunt.  That's a link to the Forbes website, incidentally so the thing has been noticed.

Abso-freakin'-lutely bree-farkin'-illiant branding and marketing invented by people who clearly have no idea what a brand is.


As we've contended around these parts from the start, only the self-proclaimed nationalists like to tell Newfoundlanders they are dumb. 

Only the self-described nationalists would promote the "newfie" image to world and think the whole thing wasn't degrading.

Not being one of those, you humble e-scribbler will continue to make the argument for the other side.  Little did we know at the time just how much the cliches were now becoming part of the official government promotional policy.

We could have saved the million and a half on the triffids crap.